Gee, Could One Thing Have Gone Right For Alan Gordon?

Gee, Could One Thing Have Gone Right For Alan Gordon?

COVENTRY, RI—You can’t call Alan Gordon a sore loser. The Compassion Party’s candidate for Attorney General took a drubbing on Nov. 6 from Democratic opponent Peter Neronha. But Gordon found some humor in the situation when the Associated Press reported the “loneliest” district in the entire nation was in Providence on Nov. 6. According to the AP’s story, nobody voted there on Election Day. That meant, Gordon quipped, in one district he’d collected 100 percent of the vote (since 100 percent of zero equals zero).

“Yay,” he wrote in a comment on Patch.

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The story about the no-vote precinct was reported nationwide. But then the state took another look at the returns. It turns out one vote was cast there. Seconds before the polls closed, a voter rushed into the former St. John’s Cathedral on North Main Street. Poll workers had already shut the machines down. So ultimately that vote was counted by hand at the Board of Elections.

The no-vote precinct became a one-vote precinct and fell into oblivion among all the other almost’s and also ran’s.

The AP had to revise its story. And Gordon was left without even a sliver of victory. Yes, that last-minute person voted for Neronha.

But Gordon is on to bigger and better.

“As to the lone vote cast at the Providence precinct to which you refer — that tiny precinct is adjacent to the holiest site in the world,” he wrote in an e-mail message to Patch. . “Not only is Roger Williams’ Sacred Well (across the street from the Church polling place) the birthplace of US religious freedom and by extension, the world’s religious freedom, but it is also the site referred to at the end of the Bible, in Rev 22:2, where the Tree of Life is restored to humanity in a city of God at a sacred wellspring where 12 Trees of Life are allowed — the number allowed patients by RI statute, incidentally. That’s why we keep going and praying at the Well no matter the consequences, including an adverse Court order, failed civil suits, and dozens of criminal citations, and even a CPS ‘child abuse/neglect’ investigation of Biblical cannabis baptism/anointing rites upon an infant there belonging to one church member.”

Gordon and Anne Armstrong, the Compassion Party’s gubernatorial candidate, are facing narcotics charges connected to growing weed. Both have pleaded innocent.

Photo Courtesy The Healing Church, Anne Armstrong and Alan Gordon